The Lies that Bind
by RunToEarth
Summary: Set after the Battle of Karakura Town.  Once the battle has ended, the truth about Yumichika's zanpakuto weighs heavily on his mind.  The strain of the secret begins to impact his life and he begins to wonder if it's worth the secrecy.  IkkakuXYumichika
1. Part I

**The Lies that Bind **

Author's note: I wanted to hold off posting until I caught up with the series but I couldn't resist. This story follows the series up until Episode 300; I have no idea what happens after that point.

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Part 1**

"**A lie may take care of the present, but it has no future" ~Author Unknown**

Yumichika dozed fitfully in a chair next to Ikkaku. The other man was lying bandaged in a hospital bed in the 4th division's hospital ward, sleeping deeply as his body tried to restore his reiatsu. The fight against Aizen and the arrancars had taken a lot out of everyone and Ikkaku had lasted just long enough to return to the Soul Society before he collapsed and had to be dragged into a bed.

Yumichika startled awake as the quiet padding of footsteps in the hall registered in his overactive mind. Glancing on the bed, he frowned at the stillness of Ikkaku's body. No change from earlier, but it was only a matter of time until his lover woke up.

When they had first arrived at the hospital, he had watched as members of the fourth division removed the remains of Ikkaku's Shihakusho to check for injuries and monitored his vitals. The healers had been quick to inform him that it was only a spiritual exhaustion. The tension that had been carrying him through the evening evaporated and his legs folded beneath him, partly from relief and partly from exhaustion. Somehow, he had dragged himself to a chair and hadn't left that spot for the rest of the evening.

He knew how incredible fortunate they were. Ikkaku was far from the only one spending the night in a hospital bed, and Yumichika's mind drifted back to earlier that evening when he caught sight of an ashen-faced and bloodied Captain Kyouraku cradling the bleeding body of Captain Ukitake among the ruins of the fake Karakura Town. He remembered Momo's still body and Captain Hitsugaya's butchered form. He hadn't seen any of the other members since, but the marked absence of Unohana in the halls told him just how serious the matter was.

Yumichika stretched, groaning as the bones in his back popped. Looking down, his face wrinkled in distaste at the state of his robes. Torn and stained with dirt and blood, he knew they were beyond saving. Creeping to the linen closet down the hall, he grabbed a clean robe. Over the years, he and Ikkaku and the entire 11th division had been in the hospital ward, injured and in some state of undress. He had ruined enough robes fighting hollows to remember where the division stored the spare patient robes.

He washed his face with the basin in Ikkaku's room and changed, cinching the pants as tight as they could go. One size fits all was not an accurate statement, he thought with a frown. Glancing over, he saw Ikkaku's eyes gleam in the dark, reflecting the light of the hallway that crept under the door.

"Ikkaku." His heart thudded in his chest and try as he might to remain nonchalant about his injury, Yumichika didn't think he could stop the joy radiating from his being.

"Mm. Yumichika." His voice was thick and gravely. Pouring him a glass of water from the pitcher on the table, he handed it over.

"How long have you been awake?"

He took a sip and seemed to be considering his answer. "Since the time you started to undress."

"Really."

"Yep, it was the sight of your naked ass that brought me back to life." All of this was said with a cheeky grin that Ikkaku attempted to hide behind his cup.

Slinking over to the bed, he sat gently and ran a hand over Ikkaku's cheekbone. "I always knew my ass was spectacular."

"No complaints from me. I've been telling you that for years." Ikkaku's hand moved from the cup to Yumichika's outer thigh. The palm settled, warm and heavy just south of the junction of his hip while his thumb dragged back and forth slowly. It was comforting and for a moment, it was like they were back in their bed, curled under blankets and breathing in each other's presence. However, instead of adoration and satiation, both of their eyes were heavy and dark as they waited for the other to bring up what had happened earlier.

Yumichika knew better than to expect Ikkaku to talk about his feelings unprompted, so he took the other man's cup and set it down. He grabbed Ikkaku's free hand, clasped it between his own and brought it to rest against his stomach.

"You scared me tonight." His voice was quiet, the shake in it seeming more pronounced in the stillness of the night.

"I know."

"I thought you were dying. One minute you were fine and talking to me and then you collapsed. I thought I had missed something…some wound or some spiritual attack."

The hand in his tightened. "I'm sorry you were scared."

There were three things they never talked about. The first two were Ikkaku's bankai and Yumichika's zanpakuto, the former due to a mutual understanding and the latter due to Yumichika's careful efforts to conceal it. The third was Ikkaku's flirtation with death. Both of them knew that death was a matter of when and not if, but nothing more was said beyond that vague acknowledgement of it. Whatever fear he felt on the battlefield while Ikkaku fought and whatever grief he would eventually have to endure was a burden he handled alone and silently.

But tonight, after spending another uncomfortable night curled onto a chair, waiting for Ikkaku to wake up, the relief he normally felt had shifted into something else.

Relief had given way to anger and fear and after having to fully release his zanpakuto to save his own life, he was finally just tired of following whatever code Zaraki and Ikkaku had adopted. Some part of him just thought that if he could just make Ikkaku see how ridiculous it was to die without using the full extent of their abilities, maybe he could tell him the truth about his zanpakuto. Even if he couldn't convince Ikkaku that a kido-type zanpakuto was an acceptable sword to have in the 11th division, he might at least stop Ikkkau from refusing to use his bankai even as a last resort.

His voice was pitched low and he spoke slowly. "I'm always scared Ikkaku. Every time you fight. And each time I see you go down from an enemy's hand, I've kept it together just long enough to do what's needed: to call back up, to drag you to the 4th, to make your funeral arrangements if necessary."

"You're strong Yumi. That's how I know I can rely on you to do that stuff when no one else can."

Taking a breath, he looked Ikkaku in the eye earnestly. "I know, I know you can trust me. But Ikkaku, you can't keep doing this to me."

"Doing what?"

"This!" His arm waved to encompass the whole room. "I can't keep sitting next to a hospital bed, wondering when you're going to wake up. Each time…it gets harder. Because one day our luck is going to run out."

Ikkaku's brow wrinkled into a frown. "You want me to stop fighting?"

"Of course not." Ikkaku's relief was palpable. "I just want you to stop fucking around out there, trying to win through force of will. If it ever gets as bad as it did today, I want you to use your bankai."

The response was prompt and simple. "No. I'm sorry." The apology was tacked on after a pause.

Yumichika hadn't expected him to agree, but he hadn't expected an outright no either. His teeth gritted together as the frustration he felt earlier began to rise. "Why?" The word forced itself out of his mouth.

"That's not what I want. I want to die under Zaraki's command, fighting to the death with just strength and will. That's what I believe in. " Brown eyes locked with violet. "It's what you believe too."

"I don't know what I believe anymore." The moment the words left his lips, he could feel Ikkaku freeze. The hand that had been rubbing his thigh stopped and fell limp against him. Glancing up though the fringe of his hair, he saw his lover's mouth fall open slightly, as if he was trying to speak. His mouth closed in a click of teeth, and Ikkaku pulled him forward with their joined hands until his back was cradled against Ikkaku's chest. "God you are the most frustrating man in existence."

The warmth of Ikkaku's broad frame seeped through the thin layers of their Shihakushos. He could feel lips moving against his ear erratically, as Ikkaku tried and failed to find something to say to help the situation. Eventually, the lips stilled and the other man shifted to roughly kiss Yumichika's hair. Sighing in both contention and frustration, he sank further into Ikkaku's frame and fell into the deep sleep that had been eluding him all night.

The next morning, things fell back into a more normal pattern between the two but Yumichika could feel the seed of doubt that he had planted growing in the back of his mind.


	2. Part II

**Part II**

**Three months later**

"Oh God, Yumi," Ikkaku's harsh breathing sounded in his lover's ear, as he rocked gently into his lover. "God, you're beautiful."

Yumichika preened and smiled softly but remained otherwise quiet, as if lost in thought.

Eventually, the quiet permeated his haze of pleasure and Ikkaku slowed down until he was resting his hips against his lover, nestled gently between his legs. His cock twitched in the velvety heat, aching to move, but the rest of his body remained still.

While Yumichika was fairly content to sit back and watch him fight, he normally gave as good as he got in bed. Possibly better than he got because Ikkaku was sometimes left with an inability to move afterwards while Yumichika cleaned the two of them up.

"What's wrong, babe?"

Violet eyes shifted down to his. "Hmm?" Then, as if realizing it for the first time, "Why'd you stop?"

He hadn't even noticed! They weren't having sex tonight, then. With a sigh, Ikkaku pulled out, despite Yumichika's feeble protests and lied next to him on the bed. "Because this is starting to feel like masturbation, seeing as I'm the only one getting off. What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong." The smile was too bright, the eyes too clouded. Spending over seventy years by someone's side made it easy to see the lie on Yumichika's face. "I'm sorry, Kaku. I was just thinking about my hair. Maybe changing it up. Now, how about you lie back and I'll make it up to you?" Soft hand pressed his shoulders into the mattress but it felt wrong.

"No." A warm body straddled his and for a second he wanted to say yes. But…"Don't, Yumi." With a bit more force than usual, he pushed him off and turned his body to sit up and place his feet on the floor. He rubbed his hands over his face and just took a second to breathe. He didn't need to turn around to see the annoyed expression on Yumi's face or to hear the soft but still intentionally audible 'hmmph' from him.

"Well fine then, Ikakku. Have it your way."

The blanket shifted by his hip as Yumichika pulled it over and around his shoulders, stealing the blankets with no pretense of subtlety. Yumichika could be a pain when he was pissed off and already Ikakku could sense a headache coming on at the thought of dealing with a prickly lover for the next few days.

Sighing, he settled back into bed. For a second, the gentle curve of his back and fall of his hair made things seem deceptively normal. But the unyielding stiffness to his spine meant a very uneasy sleep for both tonight.

* * *

><p>Yumichika blinked awake as the first rays of sun filtered through the window. As always, he was the first one up. Before he met Ikkaku, being the first to slip out of whosever bed he had shared the night before saved a lot of awkwardness and regret. Over the years, he had trained himself to be up at first light and that skill had never left him. The events of last night had left him uneasy, and he had never been so thankful for his early riser tendencies.<p>

He was dressed and styled in record time, taking one last glance at the form on the bed. Ikkaku was still dead to the world; while he could remain vigilant even when asleep, he always seemed to know when it was Yumichika moving around rather than an enemy.

Grabbing his zanpakuto, he crept out the door and fled to the top of the north wall of the Seireitei. When he had first started out in the eleventh division, every day was a battle, a battle against himself to be a better fighter, a battle to improve for Ikkaku and the captain, and a battle for respect with every squad member who thought of him as a weakling because of his appearance. For weeks it was inescapable. During the day, he was with the squad and the captain. During the night he was with Ikkaku. There was never any peace or relief.

It was two months after joining the 11th division when he had finally snapped and took off running in a direction and he hadn't stopped until he hit a wall. In a moment of pure adrenaline, he had vaulted to the top and intended to keep on running to some far away point until he could go no further.

However, the view of the Northern Rukongai in front of him and the Seiretei to his back stole his breath and his legs buckled where they stood. To be so far up, away from anyone else was liberating and he finally felt as if he could breathe again.

Over the years, he crept back. At dawn to watch the sun rise, at dusk to watch it set, before storms to watch dark clouds roll over the horizon; those were the perfect time to just _be_. He had never told anyone about his spot and if Ikkaku knew about it, he had never asked. It was his alone.

Today, he lay on his back, blinking against the rising sun. Even though it was early, the stone felt warm against his back and the black of his shingami robe drew in comforting heat. He normally came here to escape his problems, but today he had brought them with him.

Ikkaku had been right; there had been something off last night. There had been something wrong for weeks, but each day it was getting harder to conceal. Apparently, he wasn't doing such a great job with the concealment. He probably owed him an apology for being so bitchy with him last night but the last thing he wanted to do was actually admit to Ikkaku that there was something wrong. Unsheathing his sword, he raised it to the sun and glared.

Stupid Ruri'iro Kujaku. It was all his fault. Rising up to his knees, he smacked the sword against the stone, relishing the metallic clang that rang out.

"Just had to be a kido type, didn't you. Couldn't let me be happy."

He could feel his sword's smugness radiating through his soul. Over the years, he and his zanpakuto had reached an impasse. Neither one was particularly happy with the situation, and that had resulted in a form of the silent treatment. While he could feel Ruri'iro Kujaku's smugness at his frustration, the spirit remained blissfully silent. "Well, at least someone's happy about the turn of events."

Years of hiding his sword were taking their toll. He was tired of lying to Ikkaku, and the captain and everyone else. He was tired of denying a part of his soul to make everyone happy. He had never before sacrificed any aspect of his identity to please anyone, even if that meant wearing feminine clothing, keeping his hair long, wearing make up or feathers. He had never been ashamed of himself but he felt sick every time he called for Fuji Kujaku rather than Ruri'iro.

Recently he had begun to think that maybe it wouldn't be so bad to tell people…and then he would listen to his captain and squad belittle every kido user they came into contact with. And then he would remember why he hated the stupid piece of metal strapped to his hip.

And it wasn't just that he felt that he was betraying himself. It felt like he was lying to Ikkaku. Before, it had just felt as though he was doing the right thing; it kept both the captain and Ikkaku happy not to know the truth. But now, every time they were together, guilt rolled through him. Each touch felt like a lie, each stare felt like deceit. When they had sex, they shared each other's bodies, breath, pleasure. It was honest and trusting and each time Yumichika betrayed that honesty and trust.

And that's what ran through his head last night. Trapped beneath Ikkaku's frame, he had closed his eyes and lost himself in pleasure. Ikkaku had panted above him, "Open your eyes, babe. I want to see you."

His eyes blinked open and he could see affection mirrored in his lover's eyes. He normally basked in the adoration of the other man, but that night he had felt like he was being scrutinized. In panic, he faked a moan and tilted his head back, trying to escape his guilt. He must have retreated into his mind further than he thought because he didn't even feel Ikkaku stop.

"You are ruining my life!" He said to his zanpakuto. He needed to figure this out soon before things got worse.

* * *

><p>Of course, things always got worse.<p>

Ikkaku held back a wince as he watched the sparring match in front of him. He could feel his squad shooting him concerned looks but he did his best to remain unaffected. Inside, however, he was just as confused as they were.

Once a week, Ikkaku and Yumichika jointly hosted training sessions for the squad members. They both led training sessions individually throughout the week regularly but on Thursdays, they always did it together. These sessions were fairly well attended; they weren't as brutal as Zaracki's where each squad member was defeated by the captain in a free for all, they weren't as pointless as Yachiru's, and they weren't as single minded as Ikkaku's or Yumichika's individual sessions.

They played off each other well and it was a lot easier to model techniques as well as work individually with other members. One on one sparring had emerged over time in the sessions as a way for squad members to see how they measured up against the two of them and that's what he was watching right now.

12th seat Hokkaido brought his sword down towards the fifth seat's shoulder. It was an easy blow to avoid, partly because of Yumichika's swiftness but also because Hokkaido had tried that move twice already. Just like the last two times, the wooden sword made a dull thwack as it bit into Yumichika's shoulder.

Wincing, the fifth seat slid back, eyes flickering to Ikkaku, as if he was hoping he hadn't seen that. Putting as much urgency into his eyes, he hoped Yumichika would snap out of whatever he was doing and start attacking the other man.

Hokkaido wasn't a particularly skilled swordsmen and in most cases, not much of a threat. It was Ikkaku's belief that the man had only risen to his position by sheer physical presence. The man was twice the size of Zaraki but unfortunately half as cunning or determined. Yumichika could knock a man of his abilities on his ass blindfolded if needed any day of the week normally. Today, however, he was being tossed around the room and putting up minimal defense. He barely even raised his sword to attack.

It had been amusing at first to watch, thinking Yumichika has something up his sleeve. But ten minutes later, it had become odd and now it was just concerning. Still, he trusted that Yumichika knew what he was doing, right up until the wooden hilt of Hokkaido's practice sword slammed into Yumichika's face right under his eye.

Ikkaku's knuckles cracked and his foot moved forward without his volition as he watched his lover be brought to his knees. The room suddenly exploded in nervous chatter. Very few members of the squad had ever managed to draw blood from Yumichika and everyone had enough common sense not to hit him anywhere on the face.

Maybe that was the encouragement Yumichika needed because in the next second, Hokkaido was clasping a hand around a bloody broken nose. Bringing his knee to the other man's gut, Ikkaku smiled in satisfaction as the man let out a soft grunt and began to topple over. Using that momentum, Yumichika grabbed his arm and tossed him over his shoulder. It was almost comical watching such a lithe figure hurl his large frame through the air. The room shook as his body made contact with the floor. Before his body had even settled, the smaller man was atop of Hokkaido slapping him in the face until his cheeks were stained red.

"Son of a bitch." He ground out. "You better hope that doesn't scar motherfucker." Tears were streaming down Hokkaido's face and he kicked his legs as he attempted to get away.

"I concede, I concede!"

Unrelenting, Yumichika delivered another slap. "I don't care about your concession. Apologize."

"I'm sorry!" Smack!

"Not good enough." Smack!

"I'm sorry for hitting you in the face!" Smack!

"I didn't here the word beautiful used to describe my face." Smack!"

"I'm sorry for hitting you in your beautiful face." Smack! "I apologized!"

Rising to his feet, he dusted off his robes. "Yes, but that one was for being unoriginal with your compliments." Glancing at Ikkaku, he nodded. "Are we done for today?"

"Yeah, that was a….good example of why you don't want to get too cocky. Be vigilant with all opponents." The men filed out, clapping Yumichika on the back and offering their congratulations on a good lesson. Ikkaku wasn't sure how many of them actually believed that he had been teaching them not to get too cocky, but it was a plausible lie.

Waiting until the last man had gone and the door had closed, he dragged his bag over to where Yumichika was picking up the wooden practice swords.

"Sit down Yumichika. Let me check your eye." Staring straight at him, the wound looked worse than he thought. It was minor, but it had bled a lot and a sticky crimson streak drifted down his face and to his throat. Grabbing his canteen and spare bandages that he brought to the session, pushed Yumichika onto a bench and began to clean and dress it. "So…"

"I know what you're going to ask. Nothing is wrong with me."

"Didn't ask nothing."

"You wanted to."

Stopping to re-wet the gauze, he shrugged. "Of course I did. You could have wiped the floor with that guy in two seconds. You were barely fighting today. I've seen trees put up better defense. You ever going to tell me what's been going on with you the past few days?"

"I've told you-"

"And I don't believe you. Don't lie to my face."

Yumichika made a face at him. "You just know me so well, don't you?"

"I'm not even going to answer that. Now, don't move. I'm going to heal you with kido." Placing his hands over his face, Ikkaku concentrated. He was by no means a skilled or even competent healer, but he, like all of the shinigami, knew enough basic first aid to heal a small cut. It wasn't much but it kept them from having to deal with the 4th division every few days.

"Ikkaku Madarame using his secret kido to heal me? I feel so special."

"Well, I don't do this for everyone. But we couldn't have that pretty face scarring and I don't want to go to the 4th right now. And I told you not to move so stop talking." He began to move his hands away, but a pale hand gripped his wrist.

Yumichika's violet eyes stared back at him, solemn and warm. "Thank you." Leaning down from his perch on the bench, he framed Ikkaku's face with his hands. He pressed his lips to Ikkaku's; the kiss was firm and warm and for a moment, neither made a move to deepen it. Drawing back, Ikkaku rocked up to his heels so he was in a crouched position. His handles settled on Yumichika's hips and pulled him to the edge of the bench. Sinking a hand into his hair, he pulled Yumichika back down, tasting sweat and blood on his lips.

His tongue licked along the seam of his lips, and he groaned at the way Yumichika's mouth slid open for him. For a few minutes, the two lazily traded kisses but after a while, Ikkaku's legs began to hurt from their crouched position. Breaking away from the kiss, he rose to stand and pulled Yumichika up with him. "Ready to go home?" He ran his hands down the front of his robes, fingers slipping under the folds of fabric to feel soft skin.

"You're certainly eager today." For Yumichika, that was a wholehearted agreement.

"Watching you throw a man three times your size was really hot." He growled the last bit into the skin of his neck as he maneuvered him out the door. "Even though you ended the fight by bitch slapping him."

"I have no regrets."

* * *

><p>Yumichika's strange behavior continued over the next week and the more Ikkaku began to notice, the more Yumichika found ways to avoid him. On this particular day, he was up and gone that morning before Ikkaku woke up. It was a rare day off for the other man, and he knew Ikkaku appreciated being able to sleep in. However, they rarely left without saying goodbye. So it was with some shame that he silently crept from their apartment to the Squad 11 administrative offices.<p>

He wasn't surprised to see the lieutenant already there, doodling on their official documents. Yachiru was an early riser most days and chose to be productive, which was sweet but also unfortunate. Grabbing the papers that Yachiru had put in the done pile, he headed toward his desk and set about correcting them.

In most divisions, paperwork rarely reached the fifth seat that wasn't in the form of incident reports or logs from their round. However, time and experience had proven that Zaraki, Yachiru and Ikkaku were not to be trusted with anything important or official.

Like now, he thought glumly as he looked through Yachiru's monthly supply order form. 15 wooden practice swords were fine, but the 3,000 pounds of sweets were reduced to 3 (all for Yachiru)…the 800 new shingami robes….Yumichika tapped his chin, looked at his robe and thought about it. Well, that could stay.

He added in supplies for food, water and first aid, which Yachiru had completely forgotten about and set the paper aside. The morning passed rather uneventfully but the paperwork proved to be a nice distraction. Around 11, he noticed that Yachiru had become very quiet, which could either be a very dangerous or wonderful thing. Looking up, he saw the child staring at him with a wide smile, resting her head in her hands.

A wary smile crept on his face. "Did you finish everything Yachiru?"

"Yup! All done! See?" She pointed to a rather large pile that he knew he'd have to sort through later. Already, he could see the colorful streaks from when Yachiru found it necessary to illustrate her reports.

Normally, Zaraki would have come to get her at some point before lunch, but he hadn't seen the man all day. "Where's the captain, Yachiru?"

"Hmmm….I don't know!" She didn't appear worried. "Yesterday he was having a bad day. So this morning I woke up extra early to make Kenny breakfast so he would feel better. And then he still didn't look happy, so we played a game and then we colored and then I added some more bells to his hair!"

Yumichika sighed. The last thing the captain needed was more ridiculous bells in his hair. "Then what did you do?"

"Well then he said, 'Yachiru, you're driving me crazy. Go wait for the pretty boy in the office." She smiled. "That's you!" Poor Zaraki. If Yachiru was already in the office at 7, it must have been at least 4 when she woke up the captain. If there was one person who appreciated his sleep more than Ikkaku, then it was the captain.

"Well at least he called me pretty. Better than feather face."

"He said that too. So now what do we do? Oh, let's do each other's hair!"

Reaching into his drawer to grab his emergency hairbrush and supplies, he concealed a smile, "Oh, if we must."

"Do you think Kenny is mad at me?" She plopped in front of him and allowed him to run a brush through her hair.

"Of course not. Probably just cranky when he doesn't get enough sleep. Haven't you ever heard, 'Never poke a sleeping bear?' Same thing. Don't poke a sleeping Zaraki." He leaned forward and made a face at her and chuckled softly at her tinkling laughter.

He had always like Yachiru. She was the one person, besides Ikkaku, who had never judged him. She loved fiercely and fully and as much as she was Zaraki's daughter, she was family to him. Despite all the violence she had seen her innocence persisted and he envied that. Growing up poor and desperate in the Rukongai had ended his childhood too soon after it began.

Pulling her hair back, he twisted it up and reached for a pin.

"Yun-Yun?" She asked, using his ridiculous nickname. He mumbled around a pin in his mouth, but she took that as encouragement. "Are you sad too? Like Kenny was yesterday?"

Her fine hair slipped through his fingers. His hand shook and he quickly lowered it to his lap. "No, sweetie. Why would you say that?"

He could see the rise in her shoulders as she shrugged. "You just look sad. Your face is all frown-y. Like this." She turned around and made an exaggerated frown face and he forced a smile but inside his mind was whirring. If Yachiru picked up on something, there was a good chance someone else did as well. He needed to get this under control he thought, focusing his attention back on Yachiru as she began talking again. "Plus you and baldy are acting weird. So I figured it was his fault. Want me to bite him?"

This time his laugh was genuine at her earnest request. "No. But you're very smart, aren't you? Ikkaku and I are fine. Sometimes…things just get complicated."

"But your best friends, right?"

He picked up the clip again and pinned her hair into place. "Of course. That's how I know we're going to be fine." Turning her around, he presented her with two ribbons. "What color?"

"Green." Nodding, he threaded it through her hair.

"Good choice." Her face looked far too serious for the normally bubbly lieutenant. "Don't frown Yachiru. It gives you wrinkles…and then you'll look like Captain Yamamoto!" She giggled and he relaxed again.

* * *

><p>"Hiiiiiiiii! Snacks!" Nanao felt the vein in her forehead throb at the sight of the snacks disappearing one at a time into Yachiru's never closing mouth. At least she was almost finished with the plate. Looking over, Nemu shuffled a stack of papers slowly, seemingly uncaring. Right now she envied the calm of the other woman.<p>

"Om chomp chomp. Mmmmm! Thanks everybody! Let's get started." As always, the Shinigami Women's Association meeting was already behind schedule.

"Finally." Nanao muttered, helping the tiny lieutenant up the podium.

Rangiku smiled from her seat. "What's the plan for today, fearless leader? More candid photography? Because I think I can get Hisagi, Kira and maybe Renji to do this one pose-"

"No!" Glancing at the smiling and naïve eyes of the lieutenant, she added, "Let's let Yachiru decide."

Nanao dodged a fist that shot up into the air. "Yay! Thanks Nanao-chan!" Turning serious eyes onto the collection of women gathered, Yachiru began to speak solemnly. "I have an important mission. It's about Yun-Yun and Pachinko head." Her eyes grew very serious and her mouth worked its way into a frown.

Rangiku leaned over to Nemu. "Who, exactly?"

"Madarame and Ayasegawa. Quiet Rangiku."

Sighing, Nanao nodded slowly at the thought of another meeting wasted. However, Yachiru was obviously upset and it's not like they ever did anything important in these meetings anyway. "What's wrong, Yachiru?"

"They're not getting along! I told Kenny but he said to just mind my business but they need help!"

"Are they fighting, Yachiru?" Isane asked.

"No! That's the problem." Nanao eyed Rangiku who shrugged. Looking around at their faces, Yachiru let out a loud 'huff'. Then, as if explaining it to a small child, slowly explained, "They're not doing their nightly friendship sparring!"

"What?"

"You know, nightly friendship sparring. When Yun-Yun and Baldy fight in their room at night! I walked by their room one night and heard Baldy in pain! So I ran and got Kenny!" Here she glared at Rangiku who was making no attempt at masking her throaty laugh. "And Kenny said that it's nightly friendship sparring! And you only do it with a special friend! So I asked Kenny if I could spar with a special friend but he just turned reeeeaaaaalllllly angry and waved his arms around and said I couldn't have a special friend until he was dead! So I said….stop laughing everyone! It's serious!"

A sudden burst of spiritual pressure flared up, quieting the room. A ripple of laughter sounded around the room and for just a second, Nanao was sure that it'd start up again. But she looked over and saw a tiny white knuckled hand, gripping the podium and shaking slightly. With a glare and a kick to Rangiku's ankles, Nanao ensured quiet and rubbed the little lieutenant's back until the trembling subsided.

Poor Yachiru. Madarame and Ayasegawa had been at her side for almost as long as Captain Zaraki; in some ways they were probably the closest things to parents that she had because the Captain was hardly fit to raise a little girl. Nanao wasn't surprised Yachiru picked up on some tension between the two men; she was certainly more perceptive than most of the 13 squads gave her credit for.

Nanao had felt the same way growing up, the only child in a squad of adults with only the lieutenant Lisa and later her Captain bothering to giver her any attention. If she could spare the little shinigami any of the pain she experienced from losing Lisa, then they certainly would try.

"We can keep an eye on them."

"Spy on them?" Her hopeful voice trilled.

Looking at the smirking faces of her colleagues, she nodded. "Sure Yachiru. We'll report back."

* * *

><p>The bar was loud and thick with smoke, almost too loud for conversation and too dark to read another person's expression well. It was perfect, Ikkaku thought, to escape the past week. He was in a private room with most of the regular group of lieutenants and captains that showed up for drinks at the end of the week. Friday nights signified the end of the workweek, with most lieutenant and captain off duty except for the unlucky few who were on rotation for the weekend. It was good to be the third seat sometimes, although more often then not, Ikkaku and Yumichika followed Yachiru on her rounds.<p>

It wasn't that the tiny lieutenant couldn't defend herself, but they had discovered over the years that she tended to get distracted and lost when left to her own devices. Yumichika had volunteered to follow her this weekend and Ikkaku hadn't stopped him.

Things were still strained between the two and Ikkaku had the suspicion that others were starting to notice. The lower ranking men had started to steer clear of the two of them, and every female shinigami had shot him knowing looks whenever he passed.

Glancing up, he noted Rangiku's tipsy form and swiped the bottle of sake next to her hand. Adding it to his own sakazuki, he sipped it slowly and deflected another pitying glance, this time from Kira. To be fair, Kira's face normally looked like that but Ikkaku scowled at him for good measure anyway.

It was getting ridiculous, he thought as he crossed his arms and stared down at the table. It wasn't like they were fighting. According to Yumichika, there wasn't anything to fight about and as much as he wanted to believe that, he wasn't stupid. There was a wall between them now and while they could fool themselves into pretending there wasn't, it was getting harder. They coexisted in the same space but the intimacy that was normally present was missing. It wasn't gone completely…just missing.

Somehow, while he had been deep in thought, Hisagi had wound up with a passed out Rangiku on is right shoulder and a weepy Kira on his left. Captain Kyouraku reclined next to him, his flushed cheeks the only indication of how much he had to drink.

He tipped his hat when he caught Ikkaku looking. "All right there, Ikkaku?"

"'Course."

"Mmm." His voice was warm and rough, a misleading comfort because Ikkau had a feeling the conversation wasn't over. The Captain didn't disappoint. "So where's the lovely Yumichika tonight?"

"On rounds with Yachiru. But I'll be sure to tell him you called him lovely; he'll be pleased."

"Looks like he could use a compliment. He's been looking a little down."

Ikkaku hummed noncommittally and locked eyes with Hisagi who was looking between the two of them curiously. However, Ikkaku had been a part of the 13 court guard squads long enough to know that rumors spread like wildfire; he didn't need to add fuel to that by commenting.

The pleasant thing about talking to Captain Kyouraku was that he was too laid back to press for details so after no answer was forthcoming, he gave Ikkaku a wry smile and turned his attention towards Isane and Momo, causing twin flushes to appear instantaneously.

Rangiku startled awake and crawled her way over to rest her head in his lap. "Oh, Ikkaku."

"Rangiku." He petted her head softly, a gesture he picked up from living with Yumichika. "Finally had enough?"

"No, no, no…no…no…"she trailed off and for a second he thought she had fallen asleep again when she suddenly shifted. "You need more sake."

He nodded at this. "Probably."

"And sex. Lots of sex." She said earnestly. "Good dirty, sweaty sex so you stop being sad and feel better. Yachiru told us all about it."

The image of a sweaty and sated Yumichika drifted through his head and he had to carefully shift Rangiku's head away from his crotch. "Good advice. You should follow that yourself." He wasn't sure what Yachiru had said, but he didn't really want to find out.

"Yeah." She hummed thoughtfully. "It must be nice to have a partner who's there when you need them. If only we all had a love of our lives." She chuckled darkly and curled closer.

The hand that was petting her stilled and rested in her hair. It was better than nice to have a partner like Yumichika, and for a second he was ready to head back to the apartment they shared and wait for him to finish his rounds. But the thought of returning home and feeling that space between them, a reminder of how messed up things were, made up his mind.

At the end of the night, he was the last to stumble out the door, trailing behind his drunken colleagues.

* * *

><p>Meal times in the 11th division were a messy affair. Yumichika wrinkled his nose and moved further away from the shinigami to the right of him who was shoveling food very quickly into his mouth and missing very frequently. He glanced around and smiled in satisfaction as Hokkaido caught his eyes and flinched, unconsciously raised his hands to his twin bruised cheeks.<p>

A plate of food clattered to the table in front of him and despite the tension between him and Ikkaku, he couldn't hold back a smile at the state of the other man. Clearly hung over, he collapsed on a seat and stared blankly at his food.

"Morning Yumi."

"Afternoon Ikkaku." He corrected and sipped his tea. Normally Ikkaku would regale him with Friday night antics if he had been unable or unwilling to join them. Today, Ikkaku just picked at his food and kept his eyes downcast. Yumichika figured it was up to him then. "How was last night?"

"Fine."

"Who came out? "

Even with a mouthful of food, Ikkaku listed them off. Yumichika wanted to reprimand him for his manners but Ikkaku was only a step away from giving him one-word answers and that wasn't where he wanted this conversation to go. "Just the usual: Rangiku, Kira, Momo, Isane, Captain Kyouraku and Hisagi."

"Anything interesting happen?"

"Not really."

His tone was dismissive and Yumichika sighed. "Are you going to talk to me?"

"Depends"

"On what?"

"If you're going to keep lying to me and telling me there's nothing going on with you." Ikkaku finally glanced up.

"There's not." It sounded half-hearted even to him so he wasn't surprised when Ikkaku snorted and got up from the table.

"Tell that to someone who doesn't know you like I do. I got rounds. See you later."

Yumichika frowned and propped his elbow on the table. Resting his chin on his hand, he glared at his plate; he didn't watch Ikkaku leave. Not telling his lover what was going on was killing him and messing up his relationship. However, the more he thought about it, the more confused he became. Normally Ikkaku was his sounding board, but all he had to rely on was himself because of this secret.

At least Ikkaku had people he could turn to, like the group last night. He froze with that thought. The group from last night…

Hisagi.

* * *

><p>The ninth division barracks were not a place the Yumichika frequently visited; to his knowledge, he had only been a handful of times to drop off reports or to drop off a drunk Hisagi. He would have much rather been doing either or those things, he thought with a grim expression, than what he was about to do now. However, with Ikkaku not talking to him right now, he needed to think through things and that only allowed for one person.<p>

Shuuhei Hisagi.

After making a wide berth around the idiotic Toshimori Umesada trying to get his attention, like he would acknowledge a 20th seat who was that hideous, Yumichika slipped into the Captain's office and gently lowered himself into the chair across from Hisagi.

Such a graceful entrance was wasted on Hisagi, who barely glanced up from the stack of paperwork. "Ayasegawa. Did you come to make fun of my tattoo again or do you actually need something?"

Yumichika's lips twisted into a harsh smile. "Why not just draw a dick on your face? It might be more subtle."

"Funny. Did you think of that the whole way over?"

"Just popped into my head, actually. I'm quite sharp. In addition to my other fine qualities."

"Hmm." The pen finally rested and Hisagi looked up. "What is it? I don't know what a fifth seat does in your division, but I actually need to work." When Yumichika paused, Hisagi actually looked concerned. "No witty comeback? This is serious."

Yumichika rolled his eyes; it was so like Hisagi to put his personal feelings aside and act mature. How boring. "Yes, I suppose so. Nothing else would bring me to your door."

"So what do you want?"

Hisagi actually looked curious, so Yumichika supposed the least he could do would be to tell him to add some excitement to his life. "It's about my zanpakuto. Obviously you're the only one I could talk to about it. Unfortunately."

"Go on Yumichika, before my dislike of you causes me to stop caring."

He sniffed delicately and continued, not wasting time beating around the bush. "Is it worth it? To keep your zanpakuto hidden away?"

"Why are you asking? You've never seemed unsure before." A look of understanding dawned on his face. "This is about Ikkaku, isn't it? There's been talk…"

The words flew out of his mouth before Yumichika could stop them. "Don't pay any attention to whatever they're saying. Those nosy shinigami wouldn't know the truth if it stabbed them through the heart. We're fine." The words were forced out with such vehemence, that he had to draw a shaky breath once he had finished. This secret that was driving them apart would go away, and things could return to normal. He was sure of it. Just thinking of the alternative made his chest seize painfully. It wasn't worth considering, that's what he told himself.

Apparently, his outburst had stunned Hisagi into silence. He stared across the desk at Yumichika and then pulled himself together and reached a hand into his desk. "Okay then." A small white bottle was sat in between them on the table, along with two sakazuki.

"I don't need alcohol, Hisagi."

He other man shrugged and reached for the saucer-like cup. "I do if I'm going to be in the conversation. Do what you want." He raised an eyebrow as he raised the glass to his lips. "Might do you some good, though."

"No thank you. Anyway, back to what I was saying, I have kept it a secret from Ikkaku from the first time I managed to transform my zanpakuto. But after everything we've been through recently, it's been weighing heavily on my mind." He breathed out slowly and glanced at Hisagi who watched him with steady eyes. "Oh, give me that." Snatching the bottle, he poured himself a sakazuki and swallowed. "Blagh. How you and Ikkaku can drink this stuff is beyond me."

"Don't veer off the subject now, Ayasegawa. At this rate, we may never finish."

"Fine then." He tossed his hair back and smiled to himself. Perhaps Hisagi's idea of sake had some merit; the other man was already annoying him less. "But just for the record, interrupting is such an ugly thing to do." At Hisagi's gesture, he smiled to himself and continued. "I can't concentrate on anything else except telling him. It's like this," his hand twirled gracefully in the air, "barrier that sits between us. Not telling him is making is making me defensive and angry and that is not a good look for me. And seeing as you hide your zanpakuto's true form as well, I need your reassurance that this is the right thing to do."

Hisagi's head turned to the side, as if trying to get a better look at Yumichika. "Why does my opinion even matter to you?"

"Because it's the only one I've got right now."

"Here's my thought," Hisagi said carefully, "You know that deceiving Ikkaku is wrong. You're just here trying to get me to justify it for you. I can't justify your decisions."

Yumichika stood up unsteadily. He could feel his face flush as he clenched his fists. That sake must have hit him harder than he thought. "That is not what this is about Hisagi."

"Then what's it about? I will never understand your division. You all talk about power and strength but both you and Ikkaku basically cut off your right hands trying to serve Kenpachi. Both of you are only half the warrior you could be because neither one will embrace your true gifts. What power does that man hold over you?"

Yumichika sunk back into the chair, his fight drained out. He didn't have the energy or the will to engage with Hisagi, not when he felt defeated inside. "You know about Ikkaku?"

He rolled his eyes. "Everyone does…except Kenpachi. He can't see past the end of his own blade. Actually, neither can you." Yumichika opened his mouth to protest, but a raised hand stopped him. "Listen, I don't have a partner; I don't have a best friend or even a captain right now. But if I did, and I had something like you and Ikkaku, I sure as hell wouldn't throw it away on something as stupid as a lie and a sword."

Blinking, Yumichika nodded and brushed a hand through the hair falling in front of his eyes. He needed to be able to see Hisagi's response to the next question. "Even if that meant losing everything? My division? Ikkaku's respect?"

"What makes you think you won't lose that anyway with the path you are taking?"

For a moment, the room was quiet. The soft patter of feet in the distant, the bugs in the courtyard a quiet hum. For all of the tranquility of the world, Yumichika had never felt so distraught. Finally he nodded.

But what to do now? Picking up the near empty bottle, he shook it gently between his two fingers. "Got any more of this?"

* * *

><p>From the bushes, two sets of eyes could just make out Yumichika's shape moving unsteadily away from the ninth division offices. They had been crouched behind bushes for a while and Nanao's knees and legs were cramping but neither her nor Raginku said a word.<p>

"Is Hisagi…?"

"Not when I slept with him." Rangiku paused. "Maybe he's bi? Hmmm….the possibilities."

"Ugh, stop it." Nanao dusted off the knees of her Shihakusho. "You don't really think that there's anything going on between those two, right? I mean," she said, glaring over the top of her glasses, "It's certainly not unusual for you to spend the night drinking with men who are in other relationships. You don't have sex with all of them, do you?"

"Hmmph." Blowing her hair out of her face, she smiled, "They wish. But what do we report to Yachiru? That Yumichika found another special friend to spar with?"

"Leaving late at night from some other man's private office after drinking doesn't signify sex….right?"

"Uh, yeah Nanao. Say, isn't that what your captain and Captain Ukitake do?"

"Well, yeah, but that's different because they're-"

"Fucking?" She supplied helpfully.

"Ugh, you're so crude."

"But right. The fact is, Nanao, Yumichika hardly spends time with anyone outside the 11th division and certainly not Shuuhei. I always thought the two hated each other, but obviously it was just all that sexual tension that-"

"Stop." Pulling herself into a standing position, Nanao looked at the path Ayasegawa had taken. "Listen, don't tell Yachiru about this. It's all just speculation for now."

* * *

><p>Yumichika stumbled in late after his talk with Hisagi. The two had polished off two more bottles of sake and passed out before the ninth division third seat had pried the two of them off the floor and sent Yumichika back to the 11th division barracks.<p>

It was dark and a cloudy night so he was forced to rely on memory as he navigated through the apartment he shared with Ikkaku. He got about ten feet in before he tripped over a pair of sandals that Ikkaku must have tossed after he came home. Swearing gently, he made his way into the bathroom and removed the feathers from his eyes and cleaned the make-up from his face.

By now, he was sure Ikkaku was probably awake; as a warrior he was attuned to any sort of commotion when he was asleep. It had saved their lives on a few memorable occasions, but it was working against him now. Yumichika used the time from his bathroom routine to work through the afternoon with Hisagi.

The two had fallen into a drunken stupor, both ready to bury their stress under a haze of alcohol. It had been a welcome relief from Hisagi's captain and lieutenant workload and Yumichika's indecision about his shikai. Rinsing out his mouth, he knew that he wasn't going to resolve anything tonight and peeled off his Shihakusho.

Stepping out into the bedroom, he saw the shape of the futon become more defined as his eyes adjusted. An upright shape made his heart sink. So Ikkaku was awake and apparently uninterested in just going back to sleep. Yumichika just needed one more day to think things over; he couldn't deal with Ikkaku right now. With resolve, he sunk onto the futon and kneeled next to his lover.

"Ikkaku, go back to sleep, love."

As if not hearing him, Ikkaku softly said, "It's late Yumi."

In the dark, their voices fell into whispers, making the moment feel delicate, as if it could shatter any moment. "I was just discussing some training techniques with Hisagi. I lost track of time. I'm sorry." Ikkaku hadn't moved, so very gently, he brushed his lips over the other man's and lingered for a moment, just sharing each other's breath. Even in the dark, he could feel Ikkaku's eyes on him, a steady and heavy presence. Instead of the comfort or lust he normally felt, he just felt uneasiness swirling in his stomach. There was only one way out of this.

"Come on baby, I'll help you get back to sleep." Straddling his lover, he braced his body between Ikkaku's hard chest and his raised knees. He ran his hands up his naked chest, waiting for his lover's strong hand to settle on his hips.

The thing is, having the same partner for years meant that they knew each other's bodies like their own. Their movements became intuitive over time, each one responding to the needs of their partner before anything needed to be vocalized. However, Ikkaku's hands remained clenched in the sheets and he could tell Ikkaku was resisting him.

Pushing forward, he lifted up until his face hovered above Ikkaku's and put as much passion into the kiss as he knew how. He moved his lips gently, and then with more pressure until the kiss became bruising. His breath became harsher but Ikkaku remained frozen.

Something like panic rose in Yumichika's chest and he could feel his chest growing tight and his heart racing. His skin was dotted with a nervous sweat and he clenched his eyes shut so that he didn't have to look at Ikkaku. This needed to work; he couldn't handle talking to Ikkaku until tomorrow.

He brought their lips together again, running his tongue across the seam of his mouth. His tongue dipped into the warm depths of his lover's mouth, brushing softly against the top of his mouth. Despite his nerves, just the taste of Ikkaku was causing him to harden. Instinctually, he knew he wanted friction and swiveled his hips down, feeling evidence of Ikkaku's arousal nestled between his ass cheeks. A soft moan escaped his mouth and he pulled back, not wanting to go farther until he saw Ikkaku's face, until he saw his acceptance.

They locked eyes for a moment, and he could see lust reflected in his partner's eyes, barely visible amongst the concern he saw. Just when Yumichika was ready to pull back, he felt a hand thread through his hair, pushing away the fringe that had shadowed his face.

A kiss pressed to his cheek, very soft, before Ikkaku's mouth returned. A strong arm wrapped completely around his waist and pulled him in as his mouth was devoured. Moving as one, he let himself be lowered to the bed and covered with Ikkaku's naked frame.

That night, Ikkaku fucked him with desperation, fast and needy. No words were exchanged, just harsh breaths and quiet moans. When it was over, Ikkaku rolled off him and pulled his body to him, chest to back. The two quietly regained their breath as Ikkaku held them together. It was hard enough to bruise, but for once Yumichika didn't comment on the ugly purple splotches.

Time passed, and their breaths evened out, mimicking sleep. Sleep wouldn't come for several more hours, but just when Yumichika felt his eyelids droop, he felt more than heard Ikkaku whisper something into his hair.

"I wish you would just talk to me."


	3. Part III

**Author's Note: Third and final part of this story, but there will be a short epilogue up sometime next week. I've really enjoyed this little universe and have already been working on a few other stories, which should be up in a couple weeks. **

**Thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing.**

**Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing.**

**Part III**

The next morning, Ikkaku woke to the sounds of Yumichika fiddling around in the bathroom. The quiet splash of water soon gave way to the clatter of bottles on the vanity. Ikkaku wasn't quite sure what the fifteen plus bottles were for, but Yumichika tended to use every one and when prompted, could go into a two hour-long lecture on the proper use of each and the ways Ikkaku could benefit.

The soft sounds were comforting, normal. If he knew Yumichika, eventually the peacefulness of the morning would dissolve into…

"Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!"

…that. The door flung open to reveal his fully dressed boyfriend clutching two colors of feathers.

"Ikkaku, could you…?" He left the question unasked and simply held up the four feathers that were already wilting in his hands. Ikkaku smirked and patted the side of the bed for him to sit. For almost as long as he knew Yumi, the other man always needed help with some aspect of his routine. In the Rukongai, he used to brush Yumichika's hair into a loose ponytail. Knowing Yumi, he most likely didn't need the help, he just liked being pampered.

"Close your eyes, babe." Gently, he applied the adhesive and pressed the two yellow feathers to the edge of his eye. He had done this for so long that he was actually better than Yumi at it and although he would deny it under pain of death, he didn't mind the task. It was nice to do something for him, and he knew Yumi felt the same way when he took care of Ikkaku after battles, gently washing away the grime as Ikkaku lay still and retold the highlights.

For a moment in the stillness of the morning, it felt like they were untouched, like whatever had happened last night had slipped away with the night. Then Yumi opened his eyes.

His eyes were shuttered off but he accepted a good morning kiss with a smile.

Ikkaku followed Yumi's body with his eyes and frowned. Usually when Yumi had a day off, he wore one of his floral kimonos most of the morning until he would leave around mid afternoon. However, now he was attaching his orange collar on top of his black Shihakusho.

"Where are you off to today?"

Freezing for a quick second, so quickly that Ikkaku would have missed it if he weren't looking. His pale fingers started up again almost immediately, flattening the material down. "Just running an errand. I'll see you later tonight, once you've finished your guard duty."

Lie, he thought to himself. "Hm…Want to get dinner tonight in town?"

Glancing back, he caught sight of the first genuine smile he had seen in a week. "Love to. Bye Kaku."

The door slammed behind him and despite his unease, Ikkaku smiled to himself. For that one moment when Yumi forgot himself, there had been the same deep affection in his eyes that had been there for decades. Whatever was going on, Yumi would come clean with him, he thought as he stumbled into the bathroom. "Stop worrying." He commanded his mirror reflection, and sealed it was a decisive nod.

* * *

><p>Ikkaku could outmatch him in pure strength and will, but there were very few in the 11th that could keep up with him in terms of speed, Yumi thought to himself as he used his shunpo to travel across the Seireitei.<p>

He had done a lot of things in the Rukongai that he wasn't proud of to survive, but he learned fast how to move quickly to get himself out of bad situation. It was only when he was backed into a corner that he realized how vulnerable he really was. That's what it felt like now, backed into a corner by his stupid lie with no way to extricate himself, no matter how fast he ran from it.

And this time, he couldn't rely on Ikkaku to help him.

It was how they first met. It had been years before, when he was just on the cusp on adulthood. At the time, he was still all limbs and no muscle with just enough softness to his angles to be considered beautiful to the men of the Rukongai. He could cut a man to bits with his sharp tongue, but when words were beyond some men's comprehension, he had to rely on a few well-placed blows and his speed to escape.

It was on such a night when Ikkaku found him, pressed against the rough wood of the local tavern. Heavy breath against his ear, damp and hot and sour. Callused hands grabbed his arms and forced his shoulders back.

Laughter sounded behind him and he grimaced at the amusement in their voices.

"Gonna teach him a lesson? Little bitch turned you down. Whores don't turn anyone down. They're just gagging for it."

Yumi squirmed, he didn't want it. Just listening made his skin crawl and burn hot with shame and anger and disgust. His stomach twitched and if he could just get free…if he could just get free…

For a moment his words deserted him. All he could think as a meaty hand traveled up his thigh was, 'They're going to tear my kimono.' God, what a stupid thought.

"Probably used to being turned down. I know I wouldn't want to look at that ugly face." A new voice sounded off to the side, confident and strong. He barely caught a glimpse of the other man before he heard the soft 'whump' of something heavy hitting flesh and the pained groans of four men. It wasn't until the man was thrown off him and Yumi had sunk to the ground, that he even noticed that he was free to run.

But for once, he didn't want to run. He wanted to meet the man who took on four men to save him. A steady shape crouched near him. It was dark, and he just caught sight of a smirk and a glint of light reflecting off a baldhead.

"You alright, man?"

"You don't think I'm a girl?"

He heard a sharp laugh and then felt himself being pulled into a standing position. "I might have at first with all that hair…but when you were on the ground, your kimono rode up and I could see your junk." Ignoring the flush to Yumichika's face, he continued on "Kind of short, isn't it?"

"Hmmph." Tugging down his kimono, he crossed his arms and felt some of the panic fall away to annoyance. It was apparently too much to wish for a kind and gallant rescuer. "It gets the job done."

Here, the other man paused and tilted his head toward the unconscious bodies. "Those customers of yours?"

"Not paying ones. The worst kind."

"I bet. Is that what happened?" By now, the other man had moved away and was now rooting through the money purses of the other men. Grabbing a few coins, he pocketed them away and moved on to the next.

"Why bother paying when you can get it for free? After all, whores don't say no." The last part came out more bitter than he intended, but it caused the bald man to look at him.

"Hey." He said roughly, "Don't call yourself that. It's an ugly word."

Something about that made him smile. "An ugly word? Must not apply to someone so beautiful, right?" He said flippantly, feeling the abrasions that colored his cheekbones.

"Yeah."

Yumichika waited for the end of the response but nothing followed. Blinking, he pushed himself off the wall and walked over. "I'm Yumichika Ayasegawa. Thank you. For helping me."

"Ikkaku Madarame. No problem, I like a good fight. Saving you was just a perk." He glanced up the alleyway toward the street. "You gonna be okay?"

"Of course. I can take care of myself." Glancing at the bodies, he amended the statement "Most of the time."

"Good. See you around."

Even now, Yumichika couldn't remember why he didn't just let him go, but he found himself running after the man. "Where are you going?"

"Looking for the next fight."

Making a decision, he nodded to himself. "Take me with you?"

Yumichika shook his head clearing it of the memory. He was standing in front of the 9th division barracks for who knows how long. Steeling his resolved, he headed to the administrative offices. Just like in the past, he'd give up anything to follow Ikkaku…no matter where it took him.

* * *

><p>"Again, Ayasegawa? Twice in two days; I must be getting punished for something."<p>

"I'm not telling him."

Hisagi glanced upwards. Never had Ayasegawa let an insult go unaddressed. Gesturing to the other man to sit down, he received his second shock when he remained at the doorway.

Nodding, he watched the man toy with the lavender handle of his zanpakuto. "Okay then. Did you come all the way just to tell me?"

As if not hearing, the violet eyes never left the ground and such intensity created a growing feeling of unease within Hisagi. "I was going to do it. I thought about it. All night. I could barely sleep, just tossed and turned thinking about what I was going to say tomorrow. And then at some point, I drifted off to sleep and woke to Ikkaku sleeping beside me and I just knew my answer. If I want to wake up to him every morning, I can't have him know. " He glanced up once. "I've made my peace with it."

Whether it was the right answer or not, Hisagi nodded. The darkness and bloodthirsty appetite of his zanpakuto didn't leave room for him to judge the secrecy of others. "Did you want me to agree with your decision then?"

A slow smirk crept across the other man's face; so much like his old self with just a hint of weariness behind it. "No. I just wanted to say it. Thank you Hisagi. "

"You can call me Shuuhei, you know. No need to be formal."

With a graceful twirl, he backed out the door back into the courtyard of the barracks, not giving an answer either way. Smirking to himself and returning to his paperwork, Shuuhei hoped he see him again; it was nice to have a friend like that.

* * *

><p>Hidden in the shadows, Renji watched Yumichika leave and counted to fifteen before walking into the administrative offices.<p>

At the sound of footsteps, Shuuhei called out without looking up, "Back again? You miss me already?"

Not sure how to respond, Renji froze for a moment. The lack of response grabbed Shuuhei's attention and he glanced up before filing a paper away. "Oh, Renji. Thought you were someone else. Got that report for me?"

Shuuhei seemed completely at ease, in complete juxtaposition to the confusion that Renji felt. He hadn't thought the lieutenant of the ninth and Yumichika were close or even liked each other, but it seemed he was mistaken and had stumbled upon something. What they were talking about, he had no idea but something felt off about it.

Yumichika was fickle at best in terms of companionship, preferring to spend time with only the three higher-ranking members of his squad. Even when Renji had served below him as the 6th seat and saw him every day, the other man kept to himself. He wasn't rude, well no more than his normal frankness and vanity, but he was private.

He glanced at Shuuhei's open hand extended toward him and remembered the paper in his hand. "Sorry. Here." He thrust it into his hand and prepared to leave, but his curiosity got the better of him. Pausing at the door, he turned back to Shuuhei, "Was that Yumichika I just saw in here?"

Shuuhei looked up quickly. Looking as if he was weighing his options, he nodded slowly. "Just dropping off his report. Can't always be the first Renji."

Rubbing the back of his neck, he nodded. "Guess not." What the hell was going on with those two?

The whole matter would have probably faded to the back of his mind if not for what happened as soon as he left. He had only taken a few steps away from the office when he heard the rustle of leaves and felt two familiar reiatsus coming from above. Gripping his sword just in case, he stepped closer and caught sight of a flash of pink.

"Rangiku?" As soon as the word left his lips, four hands yanked him quickly into the tree and settled him on a branch that concealed him from sight. "Gah! What the hell are you doing? Ise?" He glanced at the normally sensible lieutenant and frowned. "How'd you get roped into this? What are you two doing here anyway?"

"Quiet Lieutenant Abarai." Ise said, pushing her glasses up her nose. "They'll discover our hiding place."

He rolled his eyes but lowered his voice to a whisper. "Who? Are you two spying on the ninth division?"

"Just Shuuhei." Rangiku said nonchalantly, as if spying on her colleagues was completely normal behavior. Crossing his arms to cover his chest, he really hoped it wasn't. "Now tell us what you know."

"About Shuuhei? Nothing you probably don't already know about him."

"No, about him and Yumichika. You were in there when they were. Did you walk in on something?" At his confused look, she added, "Something sexy?"

"What? Of course not! Why are you asking?"

Ise spoke up. "Last night, Matsumoto and I saw Ayasegawa leaving here after four in the morning. He was in there all day. Matsumoto," Here, she glared at the other woman, "has rashly decided that they're having an affair." The woman in question shrugged.

Thinking back to the conversation he overheard, Renji frowned and glanced back at the building he came from.

"_I'm not telling him."_

"_If I want to wake up to him every morning, I can't have him know."_

"_Back again? You miss me already?"_

It made a lot of sense.

"Do you really think they're having an affair?" He asked.

Rangiku nodded. "Makes sense doesn't it? You don't just sneak out of a man's division at night if something secret's not going on. I have a sixth sense about these things."

"We didn't see anything, so we don't know for sure. But it is suspicious that someone like Ayasegawa would come here twice in two days. It's not like the two are friends."

Leaning forward eagerly and giving him an eyeful, Rangiku said, "So? Did you see anything suspicious?"

Looking away to watch his dangling feet, he shook his head. "No, no I didn't."

* * *

><p>The clang of metal against metal rang out in the practice rooms of squad 11. Ikkaku grinned as his opponent dodged the next attack; this recruit was better than the last three that were now recovering in the back of the room. Zaraki had pulled him out of guard duty that morning to train the new recruits, a task the captain was supposed to be doing. However, the report of trouble in the West Rukongai had resulted in his captain and lieutenant taking off earlier that morning and Ikkaku was happy to step in.<p>

All in all, it was shaping up to be a good day. He was on his way to patching up things up with Yumi, he didn't have to stand around for guard duty today and he got to beat the crap out of the unseated officers and recruits of the division.

"Come on boys. I haven't even released my zanpakuto yet. Make me sweat." He laughed as he threw his latest opponent into the wall, watching him slowly slide down it. "Your left side is open, recruit. You need to work on that. But you were more a challenge than the others…but that's not saying much." Turning to the other men, he saw that not one met his eyes and huddled together.

If they wanted to serve with Zaraki, they'd have to get past their fear of pain and defeat; it'd only hold them back. "Oonishi, get ready."

The man sighed but gripped the handle of his sword a little tighter. Good man, Ikkaku thought. The door swung open behind him and his eyes narrowed at the site of the 6th division lieutenant.

"Abarai, what do you want? Wanna fight?"

The other man shook his head, his face grave. "No. I need to speak with you for a moment."

Sheathing his sword, he watched his future opponent deflate in relief. Glancing back he said, "Get fighting. I want to see you dripping with sweat and blood by the time I get back." Following the other man outside, the two walked until they were clearly out of hearing from the men training inside. Leaning up against a tree, Ikkaku waited.

"Look, I don't gossip."

Ikkaku raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me you pulled me out of a fight to gossip." Renji hesitated. "I'm going back inside."

"It's about Yumichika." He didn't raise his voice but the words carried across the distance.

"Like there's anything I don't know about him? I'm not interested."

"Well neither am I, but you two have been acting strange for weeks and everyone keeps coming to me thinking I know something. And then they tell me stuff."

"Why you?"

"Because we're friends. And anyone going to you or Yumichika would end up dead." The two grinned over this but Renji's voice grew softer. "Listen, I don't listen to that crap that everyone's saying but it came from Ise and Rangiku…and it makes a lot of sense."

Ikkaku frowned but otherwise didn't move. He doubted that there was anything Renji could tell him that would be news to him, but the small part of doubt that had steadily been building over the past few weeks flared to life. Torn, he remained unmoving.

Taking his silence as agreement, Renji began, "Listen, I didn't want you to hear this from someone else because Rangiku isn't known for her discretion, but Yumichika was seen coming out of the 9th division barracks last night."

Last night, Ikkaku's mind lingered on those words. Last night when his lover stumbled through the door close to dawn and lied to him that morning and had sex with him that night to avoid his question. Last night when he had tasted like sake that Yumichika hated to drink. The thought settled heavy in his stomach and stole his breath for a second.

Renji continued on, unaware. "I don't know what to make of it, but if he's jerking you around and cheating on you with Hisagi, then you have the right to know.

His breath returned and he sucked in air with a gulp, only to expel it in a laugh. "Hisagi? You think he's cheating on me with Hisagi? Ahahahahaha. Oh please." Tension flowed from his body and the look on Renji's face doubled the laughter. He waited until his mirth subsided to the occasional chuckle. "Please. He doesn't even like Hisagi, partly because he has Yumi's least favorite sexual position on his face. And Yumi wouldn't cheat on me. Man, your really had me for a second." Whatever doubt had risen had been squashed and pushed away for being too ridiculous for him to even consider.

"You can't know that."

Jabbing his finger into Renji's chest he backed the other man into a tree. "Yeah, I do. We don't cheat on each other. That's not how this works between us. He's never given me a reason to doubt him before."

Moving away, he was jerked back by Renji's grip on his arm. "Don't you think I know that?" He hissed. "Do you think I would buy into some petty gossip for no reason? I was part of this squad too and I've known the two of you for years. I wouldn't even be here if I didn't see it for myself."

"See what?

Releasing his arm, Renji rubbed his free a hand over his forehead and spoke slowly. "I had to drop off my reports to Hisagi today. Captain Kuchiki likes them done early so I finished it up this morning and ran it over."

Something was ringing true in Renji's story, like he knew what to expect but couldn't quite articulate it.

"I saw Yumichika there this morning. He was telling Hisagi that he wasn't going to tell you something and if you knew, you wouldn't want to be with him anymore."

Ikkaku's mouth felt dry. He licked his lips and tried to talk but it still came out choked and rough. "What didn't he want to tell me?"

"I don't know. They didn't say." Pausing, Renji looked serious. "He said he chose you and wanted to be with you. I don't know if that helps at all or makes a difference."

His response was quiet. "No. It doesn't."

"I swear Ikkaku, I didn't even understand what was going on, but then I ran into Rangiku and Ise and everything just made sense." Ikkaku nodded and walked back to the training room, the world spinning beneath his feet. Dazed, he barely registered the hell butterfly landing on his finger with a message from Zaraki.

"What's it say?"

A slow bitter grin spread across his face. "Hollows in the real world. Zaraki wants me to handle it. Just what I need."

"You can't go fight Hollows right now."

Raising an eyebrow. "I don't see why not."

"You just found out something horrible. You're devastated."

"I'm fi-" His sentence was cut off by a resounding crack, as Renji's wide palm made contact with his cheek. "What the fuck Renji?"

"You didn't dodge it. That settles it. I'm coming with you. You're in no shape to fight hollows alone."

Narrowing his eyes, he didn't see a way out of this. Grudgingly he nodded. "Fine. But stay out of my way."

* * *

><p>The sun was setting outside his bedroom window and Yumichika straightened his robe again. Ikkaku was late….he was beyond late. Nearly an hour had passed since Ikkaku's guard duty should have ended. A report, an incident, Zaraki…all of these things could have kept Ikkaku so he didn't feel too horribly concerned.<p>

So, checking his hair in the mirror again, Yumichika sighed but kept his position. He had arranged himself carefully on the bed, showing off his best features. He was positioned turned slightly against the fading light so his hair and eyes shone, with his legs stretched out before him, maximizing their length. He needed to look beautiful for Ikkaku, his own silent apology for the past few weeks. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach and despite the wait, a smile spread across his face, hopeful and happy.

The sound of the door unlocking had him straightening his posture. However, a flash of red hair dashed his hopes but did arouse his curiosity.

"Abarai. You could knock first."

The man looked surprised to see him but lowered his eyes. "Ikkaku sent me to pick some clothes up."

"Hm. And what trouble has Ikkaku gotten himself into today? Torn robes from sword fighting? Blood from a bar fight?" Ikkaku obviously didn't want to look bad for their date, and he could appreciate that even if he would have just preferred to see the man in whatever state. Pulling out some robes, he handed them to Renji. "Tell him he's late for our date and I expect-"

"He's not coming. He's still at the 4th."

Injured but obviously fine if he was asking for new robes. "What happened? Why didn't anyone tell me?" All this was said as Yumichika grabbed his sword and slipped on his sandals, with a hand on the door he looked to Renji who was clutching the robes. "Come on then."

"Look, Yumichika, he doesn't want to see you right now."

"I don't care what he looks like Abarai. I'm not that shallow." He kept his tone flippant but on the inside his heart pounded. The halting pace of the conversation made a panic swell in his stomach. What was he not telling him?

"He knows."

"Knows what? Why are you being so cryptic today?"

"Knows about you. About your secret with Hisagi." Yumichika's breath froze in his chest. Ikkaku didn't know, he couldn't know. Renji didn't know what he was talking about.

"I don't have a secret-"

Renji's voice interrupted him, frustration rising in his voice. "I overheard you at the ninth today! And I told Ikkaku and he didn't believe me, he was so sure you wouldn't lie to him. But here you are, lying now to me. Aren't you tired of lying to everyone?"

It was only a force of will and his hand on the door that kept him standing. He wouldn't let Renji see his weakness. He kept his voice quiet and cold. "It's really none of your business, is it? I'm going to go see him." Renji moved toward him, but Yumichika was already gone.

Ikkaku looked at the tattered remains of his shingami robe and frowned. He shouldn't even have been in this hospital bed and if Unohana wasn't checking up on him every few minutes to give him her cheerful version of the stink eye, he would have been out of here in a flash. He supposed he shouldn't be shocked that he had gotten hurt; it wasn't the greatest idea to take on five hollows at once, even on his best day.

However, this wasn't his best day. Not even close. And now he was stuck in this room with nothing to do but think about him and Yumichika, and Yumichika and Hisagi…doing things that only he should be doing with the other shingami. It made him sick. He wished those stupid hollows had had the courtesy to knock him unconscious.

God, all he could think of was Yumichika, Yumichika, Yumichika. "Yumichika." He said, blinking as the figure appeared in front of him, hair slightly askew from his shunpo.

"Ikkaku," the man crossed the room and pulled him to the bed. Sitting him down, Yumichika took his hands and brought them to his lips in a shaky kiss. "I just ran into Abarai. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to lie to you, I swear. I love you so much."

He froze for a second, letting the words run through his mind. But just as quickly, his mind kicked back into action. Ripping his hands away, the bottom dropped out of his stomach. Despite being upset about it earlier, he hadn't really truly believed it until the words came out of his mouth. Instead of the numbness from this afternoon, rage filled his body and he exploded with all the frustration he had been keeping inside for all the weeks they had been fighting.

"Are you kidding me Yumi? Are you fucking kidding me? It's true, what everyone's been saying? If you had told me different I would have believed you, over Renji and Ise and Rangiku because I trusted you! God, I _did_ believe you!"

"I know." The other man moaned pitifully, holding his face in his hands. "I wish it wasn't true."

"Well why is it? Why would you do that? How could you lie to me about this?"

"I knew you wouldn't understand!"

"Damn right I don't understand!"

"It's not like I planned it! If I could change it I would, believe me." Yumichika was sobbing openly now. Ikkaku pushed his fist into the wall, grimacing as he felt a satisfying crack. He laid his head against the wall, not wanting to look at Yumichika or his tears, in case he gave in and forgave him. "Ikkaku, I promise I would always choose you over this stupid thing, if it came down to a choice. I swear."

"Then why do it in the first place? If you love me and if you choose me, why would you do it? God, how could you lie to me about it?" Ikkaku's voice was quiet and Yumichika swallowed. He had no idea Ikkaku would take his lying so badly.

"I didn't want to lose you and lose everything we've worked for."

There was quiet for a moment. "Well you lost it."

He heard a laugh, bitter and mirthless, rising through tears. "That's what Hisagi said."

He smacked his flat open hand against the wall and whirled around. "Don't mention his name! I don't want to hear anything about your new fuck buddy!"

Yumichika opened his mouth and then paused and frowned. "…what?"

Ikkaku rolled his eyes. "Don't play dumb Yumi. Renji told me he saw you coming out of the ninth division barracks. I can put two and two together, you know. I'm not stupid."

"Well apparently you put two and two together and got five because I'm not sleeping with Hisagi. For fuck's sake, he accessorizes with explosives!" For a moment they just stared at each other, each retracing the conversation back to the beginning.

The door swung open revealing Renji, gasping and thrusting robes. "I tried to stop him!"

"Get out." Yumichika and Ikkaku said, eyes never wavering from each other. Not hearing any footsteps, as one, they shouted "Out!" The door smacked against the frame.

"You thought I cheated on you?"

"Not at first. But Renji overheard your conversation with Hisagi this morning and I knew you were lying about something." The last part was mumbled into his hand as he moved toward the bed. Yumichika scooted over to give him room.

"I would never do that." They sat shoulders together, pressed together but with no move to further the contact.

"I know."

"I love you."

"I know." Yumichika nudged him in the ribs. "Ugh, I love you too, geez. But Yumi, what secret were you talking about?"

Yumichika laughed and at once, all the tension in the room evaporated. "It seems silly now. It's my zapakuto."

"Fuji Kujaku? What about him?"

"His real name is Ruri'iru Kujaku. Those four released blade, that's only when he partially releases." At Ikkaku's blank look, he added, "He's a kido type." Yumichika waited for the outrage from Ikkaku and closed his eyes. When nothing came, he peaked with one eye and saw his lover froze with is mouth wide open.

At Yumichika's glance, his mouth closed and his head shook in disbelief. "So?"

Yumichika sputtered. "So? I've spent the past few decades listening to you and Zaraki insult and belittle and kick out any kido type zapakuto wielder in the 11th division. I thought you would be mad that I lied and would then kick me out of the squad!"

Ikkaku laughed and wrapped his arm around his neck, breathing their foreheads together. "In light of everything, I can honestly say I don't care one bit. I mean, I' not happy I've been lied to but I'd rather you lie about your sword than have you cheating on me. And those guys get kicked out because they're weak. If anyone with kido could kick mine or Zaracki's ass, we would shut the hell up. You've already proven to both me and Zaracki that you can take care of yourself, you're not going to get kicked out. But if it makes you feel better, I'll lay off the kido users."

A kiss was placed to the corner of his mouth. "Thank you." He could feel Yumi's smile against his lips and he mirrored it with his own.

"So what does Ruri'iro Kujaku do?"

"Becomes vines and drains the spirit energy from my opponents, which I can then ingest to restore my own spirit energy. I used it on Hisagi once, that's why I kept going to see him. He was the only one that knew."

Pulling back, Ikkaku felt his jaw drop for the third time. "Holy shit. That's amazing. How powerful are you?"

Pushing Ikkaku down on the bed, Yumichika smiled. "Just don't test me…although, I have often considered the benefit of using my vines to ensnare you for, shall we say, recreational purposes."

Ikkaku grinned as the warm weight settled over him. "You are the most beautiful, terrifying, amazing creature I've ever known."

Anything else he had to say was swallowed in a kiss. After a few minutes of reacquainting himself with Yumi's mouth, he broke away. "Babe, I'd love to continue to but I'm pretty sure I broke my hand when I slammed it into the wall. And I think I'll need all my parts to be fully functional."

Rolling his eyes but not moving, Yumi called for the nurse.


	4. Epilogue

A/N: Thanks to everyone for the positive reviews; every one made me smile and was very much appreciated. This is the last tiny chapter of The Lies that Bind, but as I mentioned before, I really enjoy writing within this little universe and want to return to it again. I do have another short story/sequel that's mostly finished and hopefully that will be up in January.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

* * *

><p><strong>Epilogue: The Aftermath<strong>

Three weeks after their misunderstanding was cleared up, Ikkaku finally gave in to Renji's and Rangiku's incessant pleading to rejoin them for their Friday Happy Hour. He had spent the last two weekends…reacquainting…himself with Yumi, but two weeks of marathon sex were taking their toll, Ikkaku thought with a smile. His hand slipped into the sleeve of his shinigami robe and pressed gingerly against the bruised ring around his wrist. Ruri'iro Kujaku's vines certainly did their job well.

As if knowing what he was thinking, Yumichika smiled at him and slipped his hand under the table to rest on Ikkaku's thigh. Ikkaku hid his grin behind his sakazuki; it seemed that they might be leaving earlier tonight than he originally planned.

"Cut it out boys. Don't think I don't know what you're doing over there." Rangiku's voice called from the other end of the table. She was surprisingly clearheaded tonight, which Ikkaku thought might have to do with the frequent looks she was shooting at Hisagi.

"So do we ever get to hear the story of what went down between you?" Renji asked. He had apologized to Yumichika weeks earlier, which had been appreciated but unneeded. Looking out for Ikkaku wasn't really a transgression in Yumichika's mind. And truthfully, it had provided the catalyst for the talk they had needed to have.

Yumichika shrugged and went on to provide a stripped down explanation of the past couple of months. "And now, it's all in the past." He finished, pouring more sake for himself.

Ikkaku frowned. "You never seemed to have a taste for sake before."

"Blame Hisagi and all those long heart-to-hearts we had."

Kira looked up at this. "That's something I don't understand. Why weren't you concerned about Yumichika sleeping with Shuuhei? You thought he might have slept with someone else but not Shuuhei. It's not like he's a bad looking guy."

Hisagi raised his sakazuki in thanks. "Maybe I'm just an honorable guy who wouldn't steal someone else's lover."

"No, that's not it." Renji said. "Ikkaku said something about the 69 on your face."

Hisagi sighed and shot a long look at Yumichika who had his face buried in Ikkaku's neck to muffle his laughter. "What is with you and that tattoo?"

"Doesn't like the position." Ikkaku said calmly. "That and he doesn't like you using explosives as accessories."

"Really?" He said in disbelief. "That's the deal-breaker for you?"

"The more important question," Rangiku proclaimed, patting Hisagi on the head, "is why you hate the position so much. Inquiring minds want to know." Even Momo and Captain Kyouraku leaned forward with interest, taking a break from their other conversation.

"Can't see each other's faces." Ikkaku said gruffly, ready for this to be over.

"That's sweet." Momo said softly.

Renji snorted. "More like exceptionally vain." Yumichika glared at this but Ikkaku silently acknowledge the truth behind the words. Apparently, he shouldn't be deprived the opportunity of seeing Yumichika's more beautiful features during sex, and Ikkaku hadn't really cared either way. He was just glad that Yumichika hadn't placed any other restrictions on sexual positions.

"I hate to correct such a lovely lady," Captain Kyouraku said, "but the more important question is, when are you telling Captain Zaraki?"

* * *

><p>"And that's the whole story." Yumichika finished, frowning at his captain's bored expression.<p>

"That's it then?" Zaraki asked. He had been resting his head on his hand, but a sudden glint in his eye made him straighten up.

Nervously taking a step back, Yumichika nodded. He could see a glint in Zaraki's eyes, one that struck fear into anyone who was unfortunate to see it. "Yes, and…I'm sorry?" He finished, hoping that was the end.

Zaraki pulled himself to his feet and stalked over. Ikkaku's hands gripping his shoulders behind him was the only thing holding him in place.

"It'll only make it worse if you run."

Trying to catch his eye, he whispered, "What will be worse? What are you-" The metallic drag of a sword coming out of its sheath brought his attention back to the captain. "Oh God. He's going to kill me, he's going to kill me." He hissed.

"Unsheathe your sword." Yumichika knew better than to question his captain and with a resigned expression and steady hand, he gripped the hilt and pulled it out slowly. He had no idea that the captain would be this angry about having a kido user amongst the ranks. Raising his sword to meet Zaraki's he just hoped to die gracefully. And he hoped Ikkaku remembered to put him in his lavender kimono for his burial. "You haven't been using your zanpakuto's true released form."

"Yes Captain."

"You've been holding out on me, denying me a good fight."

Yumichika's stance relaxed a bit and he cocked his head to the side. "So you're not mad?"

"Didn't you hear me? Of course I am! You've been holding back! Now get ready for me to kick your ass."

"So," He started again, lowering his sword and receiving an angry glare from his captain, "To clarify: you're not kicking me out of the squad. And you're not going to kill me."

"I might do both if you don't shut the hell up."

Yumichika smiled. "Yes Captain." Relieved to still be treated as an 11th squad member, he gripped his zanpakuto more tightly and nodded at Ikkaku, who released him and stepped back. "Tear in frenzy, Ruri'iro Kujaku."


End file.
